A kung fu fighter in a disco

I'M HOT CUZ I'M FLY
YOU AIN'T CUZ YOU NOT
THIS IS WHY THIS IS WHY
THIS IS WHY I'M HOT

all else is of no consequence in comparison to the MIGHTY MIMS, though armand is cheap'n'cheerful fun as ever.

enrique is fitter than i remember but just as shit. re: calvin harris - we have been here before and we called it ZOOT WOMAN and it was awful, but maybe the currently grating calvin can learn how to be a JLC.

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Yes, this Calvin Harris chap is.. completely and totally rubbish. Two completely nothing singles and liked probably by hipsters.

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I absolutely cannot be ARSED to unravel the layers of "aaaaah I mean it no aaaaaah I don't" in his record/video. He TIRES me.

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Not by hipsters! Not my crew at any rate. You must stop slagging off hipsters, these are my friends you are talking about :(

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That's OK. You're an indie kid, you should be used to people slagging off your friends.

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byebyepride.livejournal.com

ha ha!

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Can this be the next poptimists poll, please, Tom (if you're reading this?)

HOW INDIE IS LEX OUT OF TEN?

And compare him to some other notable poptimists!

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Does this question even need a poll?

Judge Pop vs Calvin Harris would be a better idea. The most annoying thing about the new CH video (given the lyrics to the song) is that all the girls look the same - i.e. same skin colour, same height and bodyshape.

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YES - the Justice Department thanks you for your tip-off, citizen.

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I have last.fm to PROVE I am not indie now!

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LAST.FM = NOT CONCLUSIVE. You're probably listening to Nine Black Alps with the plugin off!

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infov0re.livejournal.com

Explained in graphical detail, for those of you unclear on why he's hot, and you're not (http://www.villagevoice.com/music/0711,harvilla,76021,22.html).

Made me snort a lot when I read it.

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This is the sort of thing that makes me want to get homocidal on snarky music writers who aren't as clever as they think they are (see also that really un-high-larious dissection of "Hollaback Girl" some time back).

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I quite like Calvin Harris but this may be because 1)I am a student and so have an unhealthy interest in anything with '80s' in the title for reasons no one has ever quite discoverered and 2)I think he is quite fit.

The album is actually very good- I don't have it on this computer and can't remember any details other than it was highly enjoyable in a naff way.

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Enrique surprisingly great (if a bit repetitive towards the end). The Cascada-produced one unsurprisingly rub.

I ticked the Zimmers because I approve of the sentiment, if not the preformance.

More later, have to dash to a meeting.

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I approve of the sentiment too, also I approve of the way "In at #26 in the new chart AS A STATEMENT" is the new "novelty hit" (I read an article which described "War" by Ugly Rumours as "CHART-TOPPING" - in yr dreams matey!)

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JoJo - "Anything" is 11th in the May rankings, by the way.

I honestly cannot work out why the rub Mutya single has done so much better (with us I mean) than the ace JoJo one. It can't just be Popjustice approval can it? Or residual Sugababes affection?

Not much to say about this lot - Mims is a bit boring TBH but the backing reminds me of "Moments In Love" so it gets a tick. I like the ping pong ball on Enrique! Not heard most of the others yet, have heard Armand a good few times and can't remember a thing about so no tick there!

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Approval of Hellogoodbye, Maroon 5 (ffs!) and even the terminally dull SEB is far more inexplicable than Mutya which is at least pleasant and summery - but yeah I agree, I really have no idea why they're getting ticks and JoJo isn't.

The only thing I can think of - apart from poptimists being a lot more Popjustice-influences than I thought! - is that all those acts have a residual credibility which JoJo doesn't. Not really the old "write own songs blah zzz" chestnut but I've noticed for a lot of pro-pop types, "X has character" is their version of "X writes their own songs" - there's this desire for popstars to be wacky and crazy and colourful (ugh, ugh, ugh) or at least tabloid-friendly (this is better) and only then will they be considered Proper Popstars. JoJo, bless her, doesn't qualify, despite her superior songs (in which her character definitely comes through!).

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Hellogoodbye is dreadful but some people like power pop, have always liked power pop, will always like power pop etc etc. and here's some power pop with a synthy twist - don't agree, but fully understand what it's doing here.

("B-b-but it's not power pop" some carper will no doubt cry, be off with them I am sleepy and crabby and in no mood to quibble)

Maroon 5 I think I ticked! Don't remember it now though.

The thing with Mutya and JoJo is that these are two songs in the same genre and both built around a big but quite naff AOR sample.

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I didn't tick Mutya but did tick Hellogoodbye (and qu. possibly Maroon 5 despite my rampant hate of that band, every female my age seems to have an infatuation with them and my brother is like 'omg man, jazz is awesome' and it's just all indescribably hideous) because it is cute and sounds like *NSync or at least some slightly lower grade boyband.

JoJo is CREEPY. Eurgh. It really puts me off that I know how young she is- I'd probably think 'Anything' was good if Mariah Carey or someone did it. Actually, not Mariah, it'd be even more horrifically oversung but you know what I mean.

I prefer Stacie Orrico if it's got to be 'boring US teen type with good songs.' Or, well, I liked quite a lot of Stacie's last album whereas I have never felt anything other than mild annoyance at JoJo.

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koganbot

Surely you don't believe that 15-year-olds don't feel this way. There's got to be something else besides her youthfulness that's rubbing you wrong. (You're not so nonyouthful yourself, you know.)

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I think it's probably residual from when she was twelve/thirteen- she dresses very provocatively still, really, although I know it's not full-blown sexed up or anything but it brings out the total prude/maternal instinct in me. She just seems like she's being exploited really.

I just re-listened to 'Anything' and it's nothing without that sample. All it makes me think is I really ought to listen to more Toto... I dunno, she just seems very 'nothing' to me.

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She's not that young though! She's 16, which is around the same age as Destiny's Child when they started out.

'Stuck' by Stacie >>>>>> all JoJo songs, but I can't think of a single other Stacie song which is Any Good At All whereas JoJo's entire last album was Any Good At All.

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After some analysis I think it may mostly be JoJo's face which particularly annoys me. She'd probably be quite pretty if she wasn't wearing so much make up, too; she just seems to be dressed up like one of those horrible beauty pageant things. I dunno, when I was sixteen I was a grunger so it looks terribly tarty to me but I guess it's no worse than most girls walking down the street these days.

Aesthetic aside, though, her songs never do anything for me and it all seems very cheap and lazy. Although possibly that's just based on how annoying I found 'Leave (Get Out)' because I guess 'I'm Not Missing You' (http://youtube.com/watch?v=M9eVjrSxYh0) by Stacie Orrico sounds quite similar.

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blue-russian.livejournal.com

JoJo looks very young, however, and started before she was 16, no?

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Oh she has a Lego face, puberty has not been especially kind to her, but on the plus side she has a properly good voice now.

I was never wholly taken with 'Leave (Get Out)' either but 'Too Little Too Late' is just gorgeous, as are a couple of other tracks of her new album ('Good Ol' in particular) - having said that, while I do like it, I don't think 'Anything' is perhaps the strongest pro-JoJo argument to be made, I did have to go back to it when it charted because I couldn't remember how it went.

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Snap.

As I keep saying, "Like That" is the only nu-JoJo track I like.

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koganbot

JoJo is great but I actually have yet to discern much character; or, more accurately, she's in character for the songs (yearns on this one, piercingly withdraws on the previous), but hasn't established a JoJo character. And this lack of character does not matter to me when listening to her music though I tend to forget about her when I'm not. (Compare to Lohan, who established a strong character for me the instant I heard "First" and "Drama Queen," knowing nothing of her movies or the tab rumors, or of "Rumors," for that matter.)

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Yes - she is not a character herself (she is not a "proper popstar" as some would have it) but she expresses different characters v well in her songs.

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But JoJo is rub! It sounds like hold music, the only benefit being it is hold music with Toto but then I could just listen to Africa for the same price, couldn't I?

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chezghost.livejournal.com

i think the Mims track is boring too but check out the mash-up of it with Toto's 'Africa' on youtube if you haven't already as that transforms it totally for the better.

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kill-yr-idols.livejournal.com

"Anything" not getting love? Better go back & fill out a bunch of these (figuring out tags = hurrah) ... there's a lot of "Africa" going round this year, eh? JoJo, "This Is Why Africa Is Hot", the Rune Lindbaek electro-beardo edit ...

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Yes, and they're all not very good! The Lindbaek in particular is awful. He is capable of so much better.

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katstevens.livejournal.com

Poor selection this week.

Marilyn M: so dull! "NOES MY WIFE LEFT ME I AM SAD" whatevs NO TICK
Calvin Harris: not as catchy as the last one but twice as smarmy NO TICK
Armand Van Helden: dull as dishwater compared to 'Touch Your Toes' which is all the awesome NO TICK
Zimmers: not heard this in its entirety but the idea makes me very uncomfortable. The old people look like they've been forced into it against their will! Leave them alone! NO TICK
Enrique: It does actually have a ping pong noise in it! And a pleasant vocal - he has improved vastly since last album and seems to have a sense of humour/less slimy now TICK

Not heard the rest.

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The guy from Tiny Dancers has a very long face, a bit like Tom Petty does. They sound a bit like Sixpence None The Richer, only not as good. Quite jangly.

Simply Red is the usual strained guff from La Hucknall.

The Armand video annoyed me - look trendy girls have nice arses too!

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Tiny Dancers has been playlisted by Radio 2, so I recognised it instantly. The high recognition factor made it tickworthy for me, although I don't remember actually liking it much hitherto. Possibly an grower.

As far as this sort of soft-indie rock goes, I much prefer Ghosts. I may post the video to their new single in a bit.

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what about MIMS?!

It must also be noted that the M Manson video is extraordinarily grim. DEO NOT WANT TO SEE ELDERLY GOTHS CAVORTING.

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Kim Pozzi is not very good trance, I shouldn't have ticked it really.

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I just went back and ticked it. It is surprisingly good IMO and contains the above line thus has brilliant comedy factor although am not per se "in the mood" for it.

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But Manson, M. is actually all about his new girlfriend being younger than him (by about twenty years I might add) and how everyone is calling him a paedophile because of it. It is great fun and I like it a lot.

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koganbot

Calvin Harris: Twisty half-bosh beat; funnyfunk voice that gets to me. Reluctant tick.

Mims: Fun novelty track built on a dark sound that's eerie as fuck. Which'd be strange except that all crunk-snap-hyphy influenced novelty tracks do this. (Interesting that a NYer hits by copying the Dirty Dirty and the Yay Area.) Big tick.

Marilyn Manson: Can't sing. No tick.

Armand Van Helden: Shit vocals, great beat. Tick.

Kim Sozzi: Assume it's the Cascada remix that's getting the airplay. Shit vocals, great beat, but not great enough to compensate for vocals. Borderline nontick.

Zimmers: Can't hold a candle to the original Hilary Duff masterpiece. Travesty. Emphatic nontick.

Enrique Iglesias: Ping pong good, Enrique boring. Tickless.

Tiny Dancers: A nice, shallow '70s style pop song, but something feels indie about it - maybe a whiff of the rueful, a special lack of commitment? Borderline nontick.

Simply Red: The song is surprisingly songless. Lives in a world without ticks.

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blue-russian.livejournal.com

I know that's probably just kind of a flip one-liner, but otherwise I'd find that a pretty objectional statement. (e.g. why I sometimes get annoyed about lex's comments about people singing well, because it leads me to think that subsconsciously he just hates everyone who doesn't have a classically great voice. although i'm sure he doesn't actually think that.) otherwise we'd all just only want to listen to idol contestants.

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Mediocre tallies of R Kelly and Mims - both songs which have been massively successful in the YS, and which are two of the best singles of the year - in recent weeks = ????????????????????? and :(((((((((((

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MIMS doesn't really go anywhere for me- it's quite nice and unobjectional but it doesn't grab me. The bloopy bit reminds me of something else that I liked about seven years ago although I don't know what (vaguely suspect 'Movin Too Fast' by Artful Dodger but this seems implausible) and it doesn't make me want to listen to it again. I suspect it's like all the wibbly tuneless things I enjoy and everyone else thinks are rub.

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