I Did Not Suspect Reverse Psychology

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

Natasha Bedingfield - N.B.

As a rule of thumb, I don't fork out cash for a pop album until I've heard at least two good tracks from it. Some of this is a hangover from not being able to afford any albums at all a couple of years ago, but recently I've become more adventurous with my music spending. Last year, despite low expectations, I purchased Fergie's solo effort after hearing 'London Bridge' and 'Fergalicious'. It took a while for the rest of the tracks to grow on me but I was pleasantly surprised. Growing in consumer confidence and victim of a particularly vicious 'I Wanna Have Your Babies' earworm, I bought the Tash-Bed album. Worryingly, this may well have been because I thought no-one else would! I wanted to give her a chance.

The Dutchess was never going to sound much different to the Black Eyed Peas' brand of appealingly dumb R'n'B - but what to expect from N.B.? What genre does Natasha Bedingfield fall into? 'Mental' is one throw-away answer, but for the want of a musically descriptive term I'll plump for 'attention-seeking'. All the songs have Tash's voice right at the front of the mix - there's no escape. All the songs are about Her and how She's feeling: happy, sad, confused, bored. B-Day was a story focusing Beyoncé's relationship with (ahem) some dude, but there was plenty of acknowledgement given to the listener through various tidbits of advice ("put on your Freakum Dress" etc). Tash is having none of this 'third person' business, let alone a cogent narrative. Hey you! Listen up! It's [fanfare] NATASHA BEDINGFIELD and her spell-it-out-slowly Personality! She's even put an explanation of 'N.B.' on the inlay sleeve (including Latin pronunciation): "In present day English it means 'Pay Attention' or 'Take Notice'". LOOK AT MEEE! I'M NATASHA B! RHYMING COUPLETS ARE VERY EA-SY!

Tash's bludgeoning empowerment-by-numbers is irritating, but for some reason I desperately want to give her the benefit of the doubt. It worked for the Fergie album - could Tash grow on me in the same way? Her lobotomy-happy lyrics are certainly bonkers enough on 'Backyard': "Your lasso, my tiara, my wand, your plastic bazooka!" (scrub your minds out, she's merely reminiscing about dressing-up games with the boy next door as a kiddie) is more than a match for Fergie's genius line "I'm not going to miss you like a child misses its blanket". However Tash veers wildly back to the banal on 'Say It Again': "Cos I have so much love for you... I give you my heart...Should be so easy but my head gets in the way" We get the message! You like some bloke quite a lot, and are going to string this out for three and a half minutes. I love you, you love me, we all live in Sesame Street. Whatevs.

So things aren't looking good for Tash. But wait! I've mentioned on a couple of poptimists comments threads that I've become increasingly aware of my current music tastes slowly drifting toward the mum-pop demographic. This is due to acquiring a taste for:

- ridiculous ballads
- feeling HAPPY
- string sections
- blokes with lovely voices (eg Lovely Dan from Lovely The Feeling)

On 'When You Know You Know', Tash has certainly ticked the first three boxes and in doing so has come up with a winner. Picture Luther Vandross serenading a lucky lady with a Magic FM car bumper sticker, complete with 'brvvvlom-pom-pom, om-pom-pom' piano waltz bombast and a 'me-ee-ee aa-and Mrs, Mrs Jones' esque breakdown. It's very enjoyable, and for a split second you can forget that it's Tash's grinning mug squeezing her vocal chords till they bust. The middle-aged hopefuls on X Factor will be singing this a capella at their auditions in 3 years' time.

I know in my heart that over half the songs on N.B are bland filler. And that I don't actually like her voice. Or her face, especially when she smiles. I'm not even sure I like her anymore after the second (yes, second) secret track - a thinly disguised 'thank you message to God', yikes. But on the third listen the line 'rushed like lemmings off a cliff' crops up without warning! And there's Eve's brilliant guest rap, plus that great trance-blip background noise worthy of a Timbaland production on 'Not Givin' Up' - and I'm forced to rethink my position and give her some credit. ARGH! Goddammit Natasha, stop messing with my mind!

Comments

Addenda:

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

- Sticker on the front of the album proclaims: "CD ALSO UNLOCKS A SECRET AREA ON WWW.NATASHABEDINGFIELD.COM." Bwahahahahah! The inlay however refers to it as 'NATASHA BEDINGFIELD'S SECRET WEB VAULT'. Ahahahahah! I don't know why I find this so amusing.

- Daniel makes NO appearance on the album whatsoever, I think this is a mistake on Tash's part

- The rubbishest tracks are bafflingly, co-written by either the Maroon 5 dude or Mike Elizondo, who wrote 'In Da Club' for 50 Cent. Wasted opportunity, or rejected songs from other Sony/BMG artists? WHO KNO.

Addenda #2

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

I wonder if I am the only member of poptimists that has actually even considered purchasing NB, let alone bought it! I think I will post some snippets of the best bits later in the week so you can judge for yourself.

Re: Addenda #2

[justfanoe.livejournal.com]

Rest assured, I have considered purchasing this album and likely will. "Babies" is still my number one of the year to this point, though something will pass it up sometime or another. I have an inexplicable soft spot for Unwritten, though it is at least half-filler.

As for mom pop, "Unwritten" and "Breathe (2AM)" by Anna Nalick were in my top 10 singles of 2005 (very nearly both in the top 5) which deeply disturbs me even today.

Re: Addenda #2

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

Most of the highlights of this album are from Steve 'These Words' Kipner. Nalick is nowhere to be seen :(

Re: Addenda #2

[cis.livejournal.com]

I have considered purchasing it! alas i am broek and have a records-to-buy list as long as the arm of a thing with very long arms.

My grand unifying theory of tashbed: all of her songs are CHICKLIT NOVELS and hence awesome.

Re: Addenda #2

[justfanoe.livejournal.com]

cis, this theory is amazing. I will re-listen to her debut album later tonight with this in mind.

Re: Addenda #2

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

The rubbisher ones on NB are more like Mills & Boon!

Re: Addenda #2

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

Oh man, I am glad I am not alone in this reckless pursuit of pop pointlessness! It's just... the album is so WEIRD!

Re: Addenda #2

[piratemoggy.livejournal.com]

I know poptasticuk is quite a fan of her and liked 'Babies' so I assume it was at least a possibility for her, too.

Re: Addenda #2

[poptasticuk.livejournal.com]

I have bought it - only listened to it once though. Can I instead recommend Sophie EB's Trip The Light Fantastic? It's consistently great and even has songs written by a featuring Dan from The Feeling!

Re: Addenda #2

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

Lovely Dan from Lovely The Feeling? Hooray! Oh, why can't more bands be like Supertramp...

[dickmalone.livejournal.com]

I went to go see Pirates of the Carribean on Saturday and they showed the entire video for "Babies etc." before the film, which made me super happy.

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

'Babies' is still great. And pretty dissimilar to anything else on the album.

[piratemoggy.livejournal.com]

but what to expect from N.B.? What genre does Natasha Bedingfield fall into? 'Mental' is one throw-away answer, but for the want of a musically descriptive term I'll plump for 'attention-seeking'.

I had been wondering for some time what really got on my tits about Natasha Bedingfield and that specifies it exactly- it's the in your face lookitmelookitmelookitmelookitmeLOOKITME!!! unrelentingly thrust in your face. That and she is altogether too cheery and nicey-nicey 'ooh look I've got balls yeah girls this is awesome and aren't boys ace when they're great?' for me, she kind of reminds me of Bunty magazine or something. You cannot possibly attempt to read a book about failed humanitarian efforts while someone burbles 'iluvuiluvuliluvuliluvu!' in your ear. Or, well, I can't anyway and the degree necessitates the sacrifice of the latter for the former.

However, I suspect since the Fergie album grew on me a whole lot and I now really, really like it I should probably give this a go, based on your discussion. Also anything with a line about lemmings probably can't be all wrong.

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

I would advise caution! There are at least four brilliant tracks on The Dutchess; there are at least three very good ones on N.B. in total but unfortunately one of those is many awesome bits spread out over several otherwise mediocre songs.

I am still quite stunned as to her dismissal of everyone else in the universe apart from her and the bloke she's fallen for. And even he seems like a mere vending machine to dispense Important Feelings for her to sing about very loudly.

[piratemoggy.livejournal.com]

Ah, hrmm. I'll cautiously download acquire it in a totally legal fashion then.

It's very... mad as in proper actual mad innit? She was doing a degree in psychology before she was a pop star, wasn't she so maybe she got the plague all of them get, convinced herself she was insane and consequently went so. Or possibly she is just one of those women who is mad like that. Cosmoitis or whatever they call it.

Actually, how old is she, anyway?

[thenipper.livejournal.com]

She is the Anthea Turner of pop.

[braisedbywolves.livejournal.com]

Kat for sole contributor to Smash Hits Melody Maker Observer Music Magazine!

more kat, please

[blue-russian.livejournal.com]

yes, as i was reading this i was thinking how i almost certainly was enjoying kat's review more than i'd like the actual album :)

[justfanoe.livejournal.com]

OK, in the mid 90s when there were a surplus of sensitive feminist chick artists with a touch of edge (Paula Cole, Sarah McLachlan, etc.) they all banded together and formed the Lillith Fair tour. So who is up for a massive mom pop tour starring Danielle Brisebois and Tashbed and Natalie Imbruglia and Anna Nalick, etc?

[justfanoe.livejournal.com]

For those of you who don't know, I'm a 25 year old male who is torn between my love of teenpop and mom pop, leaving little time for me to listen to music appropriate to my age and gender.

NB vs. Alanis

[blue-russian.livejournal.com]

Admittedly I only know the two singles from the last album, which I really quite liked, and "Babies," which doesn't do much for me. But isn't this relentless navel-gazing aloud really just the same thing as Alanis, just without the anger?

Re: NB vs. Alanis

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

The anger makes a big difference I think! Plus, Alanis engages with her audience, e.g. on 'Ironic' she is imparting her vast knowledge of said word to help out the dictionary-lacking listeners, on 'Thank U' she acknowledges that there is an outside world there somewhere [um...I've run out of Alanis songs, which is shocking considering I knew all the words to 'Jagged Little Pill' off by heart 13 years ago, so much so that I gave the inlay sleeve to my chum Karina when I taped it for her]. This doesn't make it any good at all of course, but Natasha really is on a different planet. Planet Natasha. Population: 1.

Re: NB vs. Alanis

[ms-bracken.livejournal.com]

I think there's a difference in the way the listener is addressed, though - Alanis' songs are very directed at what we can imagine to be an actual person, whereas Bedingfield, really, it could be anyone at all. I've actually been thinking quite a bit about pronouns in pop music recently (and could write about this for longer, but work presses...) so the Tashbed example means I can add another one to the current list-

- listener is passive, directly addressed (cf Alanis' You Outta Know)
- listener is active, directly addressed (cf pretty much anything off of Beck's Sexx Laws album -weak example but not noticed this one many other places)
- third party known to listener and narrator address through listener (cf FOB's Sugar, We're Goin' Down)
- narrator sings about narrator to generic or unspecified audience (cf Bedingfield's Babies)

[catsgomiaow.livejournal.com]

I still frickin hate her and everything she stands for, obv.

She doesn't HALF look like Rob out of Silver Springs's sister tho.