poptimists | Chart Championship Week 12 RESULTS now with REVEALS

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Chart Championship Week 12 RESULTS now with REVEALS

blue_russian hands out the final scores. Who's won? Let's find out:

"Thanks to everyone for their submissions. The headline news is as follows: st least three teams went down in defeat, three teams played well but found our defense well- prepared. The other five of you, well, we'll see how the ref calls them...

01. Basshunter - "Boten Anna". Completely incomprehensible language, which has kept me concentrating several times to try and figure it out. I reallly like the sonics on this. The "ready for takeoff" line and instrumental break reminds me of 1999, when I kept finding myself at the hot spot of the winter in Kyiv, the "Al Capone" disco, constantly unable to decide whether I was more disturbed by the fact that there were 17-year-olds all over the place, or because it was always really exciting when a Scooter song came on. At first I thought this was

byebyepride's track, but the language thing makes me think it's

lockedintheattic's, for some reason. Fifth place, for a WIN I hope. (Yes - Ed.) -

byebyepride saved from relegation by scrappy win.

02. Head Automatica - "Beating Heart Baby": Hmm... a rocker. You seem to have discerned my true inner self. Damn. Yeah, it's okay, I guess. The vocalist seems to feel that *yowling*. is necessary to communicate emotion or excitement, or perhaps the guitarist is cuter and he's trying to get the girls in the front to look at him again. I guess I like this -- it's got the double lead vocals in places (thank you) -- and I think it'll probably get some pretty good rotation this summer, but unless this band has a couple more equally good singles, there's not much in this for the ages. I listened to that Dandy Warhols song a lot for a year or so, too, you know what I mean? Eighth place, somehow. - LOSE - defeat ends frustrating season for

poptasticuk

03. Maxi, Dick and Twink - "Things You Hear About Me": Argh - a jaunty girl group. This is really unpleasant. Is it over soon? Tenth place - LOSE -

lockedintheatti's side soundly beaten.

04. High Contrast - "Twilight's Last Gleaming": Funk - oh no not really. D&B drum pattern. Spacey piano. Martha Wash-y vocals. Probably a winner on "elements," although the "song" is so-so. I find the drums aggressive (a little too loud in the mix?) I wish this one went on longer. Narrowly loses to Track 1 - sorry, friend. Sixth place - WIN - relegation heartbreak for

piratemoggy: results elsewhere mean win is not enough.

05. Pointer Sisters - "How Long (Betcha Got A Chick On The Side)": *Real* funk, this time. Isaac Hayes strings. This is some classic 70s stuff, and I don't know it. Easily my favorite track so far. ... Man, this vamping is going on a long time -- maybe that's all there is? Oh, ok, now we're starting. Not crazy about the lead vocal line, but I like the interplay lot. En Vogue 15 years ahead of their time. Can someone get the lex to listen to this, please? Much better than "Umbrella." Third place - WIN - slick win lets

epicharmus end season on a high note.

06. Lucky Soul - "Add Your Light To Mine, Baby": I very much approve of your strategy, sir/ma'am. I love those northern soul-y horns (and there's a key change, too!) -- I don't think I said anything in particular to clue you in, but maybe you picked up on the Etienne Daho submission from a few weeks ago, which has a somewhat similar sensibility. i am a total sucker for this stuff, and for the first 15 seconds this was pure joy for me. The lead singer's voice is a bit twee for me, which is the only real downside, otherwise I find it hard to imagine that this wouldn't make anyone smile. Fourth place - WIN -

infov0re delights fans with end-of-season win.

07. Aly And AJ - "Rush": I don't know if I explained myself well, or it's just that this is just the same song as "4ever." But I love whatever it is that's going in the vocals in this song. Unfortunately

koganbot has mentioned Aly & AJ enough over the years that I had to at least check them out, so I know this, even if I won't listen to them on principle. (Lord save us from eighteen-year-olds who believe in creationism.) By the end the song is a little same-y, but overall v. v. good. "Rush" gets second place but a DRAW - youthful strikeforce come good for champion

koganbot (even though they didn't win).

08. Yes - "Tempus Fugit": Steve Howe, Chris Square, and Trevor Horn - how could this be anything but a winner? Lots of interesting riffs and sounds, plus a melody and relatively concise structure (well, for this band). I'm assuming this was

jeff_worrell's track, and it was also a good call: I still listen to this album, occasionally. Unfortunately I knew this one, too, from the first chord: "Tempus Fugit" by Yes. First place - DRAW. - thrilling draw means

jeff_worrell must rely on play-offs for honours.

09. Dyke And The Blazers - "Wrong House": Look, (martin?) the honest truth is that although these guys are definitely earning their money, this is the kind of blues/soul that I will almost never listen to all the way through... certainly not for 10 minutes! (In fact I had to force myself to do it this time -- the best part is the last minute!) I am fond of telling people that jazz and football are more fun to play than watch, and I kind of feel the same thing here. Which is not to say I don't have a reasonable amount of this that I put on in the background on lazy weekend afternoons if I'm say, cleaning house. But "Compared to What" has that great piano riff and a chorus. Ninth place, and it deserves a LOSE in my book. -

martinskidmore fails to go out with a bang.

10. Prolapse - "Visa For Violet And Van": Moggy, moggy, moggy. Don't you like music with melodies? (Oops, sorry if it's not actually yours.) There are some interesting aspects to this -- the build-up: drums, then the bass riff, and then the angry guitar doubling it. I understand for drone to work you've got to go on for a while, but this doesn't really take me anywhere. What's the chanting about? Why is the other guy trying to sneer his vocals like John Lydon? Maybe not actually as odious as track 3, but they're both going into the "don't play again" folder, so what's the diff? Eleventieth place. LOSE -

skillextric thumped with nothing to play for.

11. Kim Weston – “Take Me In Your Arms (Rock Me A Little While)”: Does he know the original or not? Yes, I do. I prefer the Doobie Brothers' version of "Take Me in Your Arms," but like any good music obsessive I also had to a) check out the original version and b) do a reasonable job of exploring Motown history. The Doobies' version is just more joyful, frankly, plus the production values are more "modern." I just hear the room too much in this version. Seventh place, so I'm compounding injury with insult for Kim Weston, because I think that's a LOSE and not even a DRAW. Nope, it's a draw - Ed.) - stalemate keeps title out of

lisa_go_blind's grip.

Reveals at half-one-ish, I think, but maybe later.

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ah, Prolapse. I've always wondered what they sounded like. This held my attention. I quite liked what Mitya didn't like about this one: that its contents beg questions as to their point.

ALSO: aly and AJ should team up with ASIA and form a supergroup called USSHER

(CREATIONIST GAGS I GOTTEM)

"Tempus Fugit" is indeed mine.

I knew #2 (which I like a lot - I found it on

umlauts' site IIRC) and obviously know #7 as well. I reckon #7 isn't

koganbot's pick though. I think it might be

byebyepride who chose this.

Track #5 is awesome, and I googled immediately to find out what it was. I can't believe this track isn't on one of the dozens of funk/soul/breaks comps I own. The comp that it is on has immediately been added to my Amazon wishlist.

track 7 isn't mine! I agree with you that it's probably not

koganbot; I thought this was an ultra-high risk strategy, and I'm not sure who could afford an all-or-nothing roll of the dice like that.

Although

koganbot did say "Knowing what I submitted, I wouldn't put my money on me to finish atop the division" when he posted his rankings last week...

My other idea was that it was

poptasticuk, but I think she may have surprised me this week.

I LOVED the human wah wah on track 5 but haven't actally listened all the way through to it yet. Good work tho.

#2 was my #1 single of 2005.

Just squeaked in for a win by the looks of it! You were right first time on the ID of the track 1 player,

blue_russian! I've no idea what language it's in -- I heard it on an advert for mobile phone ringtones when I was in Prague! Glad I kept quiet about it and hung on to it for the League, now.

Where is Jessica today?

Hey, I listened to the Pop tracks last night and started to rate them, but I just wanted to check: exactly what format do my results need to be in? do I just rate them from first to last, in order, with my comments, or do you need scores or anything like that?

Review them in the order they appear on the disk. Put your ranking of each track (1st place, 2nd place etc.) at the end of each review!

Okay! I should get that to you tonight!

I have to credit long-time a.m.a./ilxor Brian McDonald for hipping me to the track I submiited.

Yes, I am pretty sure track 9 is me - I think they are about the funkiest band ever, although that one is a laid-back groove. I love it enormously - the vocal, the humour, the music. Sorry you don't!

Unfortunately for you, this keeps the Classy Koganbot Teen Of Pop Counterrankings tight, since I know the track. Interesting that you chose this one rather than "So Sharp" or "We Got More Soul" or the title that someone else made famous.

I did seriously consider So Sharp in particular, but I really do love this one more - it always amuses me greatly.

Track 9 is all about the rap, I think. If the vocalist's story and delivery doesn't draw you in, nothing else the band is doing will help.

I found what he was saying rather addictive. In the end I did fast-forward through some of the song last night simply because I wanted to leave the office at a reasonable hour. But I kept hesitating with finger poised over the mouse because I was constantly wondering what the dude was going to say next. And I do want to hear the whole thing ASAP.

No problem - as I said, I'm sure it will be shuffling up occasionally on Sundays :)

Ha! I think the three playoff contenders might have all pulled draws. I chose "Rush" 'cause [Bad username or site: blue russian @ livejournal.com] had said he would refuse to listen to Aly & A.J. and I decided there was no way he gets away with that. But turns out he'd wavered in his principles! Anyway, after one cursory listen, here are my ratings.

I know TRACK NINE already (and the performer not only gives his name, but refers to his most famous track). So, here, after one bare listen, is how I rank them.

Winners:
--TRACK FIVE: I know the bass part, since this was used as a breakbeat early on in hip-hop (trying to remember the track); tremendously excited to hear the original. Good good soundtrack funk, loses some intensity when the vocals come in, but a dramatic chord shift builds it back up.
--TRACK TEN: What I call "grumbling bass." An indifferent, monotone woman and a hysterical guy. Isn't it always this way? This is "Opposites Attract" by Paula Abdul! (Just kidding.) It's powerful, even if their heads probably reside up their own butts.
--TRACK ONE: A really sweet voice (a lot of Europop uses people with ordinary voices on bubble gum tunes, which sometimes works perfectly); and pretty instrumentation.
--TRACK ELEVEN: Run-of-the-mill early girl-group soul. Doesn't thrill me, but it's a nice functional little track.

Damn, still can't find the hip-hop track that uses the Pointer Sisters' breakbeat - there's one that comes real close (my favorite hip-hop track ever, actually), may have used this as a reference, but I'm sure there's another that copies it exactly; it's not immediately jumping to mind, and I don't have time to run through my hip-hop singles today. (Also, Salt-n-Pepa quoted the "chick on the side" bit, but I'm trying to figure out who used the breakbeat.)

Here's my draw (oops, titles have been revealed):

--TRACK TWO (Head Automatica): Really interesting, since I can't tell if this is emo going pop or pop going emo. I like the harmonies and the massed guitars, but I still feel I ought to resist these emo bawlers.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boten_Anna

Extraordinary!

Ha! This is like all the Roxanne songs back in '80s hip-hop. Someone needs to create a compilation of all the different "Anna Boten"s.

Isn't this the Turing challenge in reverse (rather than a computer convincing someone it's human, this is a human convincing someone she's a bot).

Is it the reverse, or the control? I bet

jauntyalan is in the know!

I am distraught that someone, ANYONE, considers "Beating Heart Baby" a loss.
But thrilled to have poptimists' first mention of the GENIUS that is Lucky Soul - SEARCH "My Darling, Anything" IMMEDIATELY.

Thankyouverymuch!

Caught them live at HDIF Presents like, last week, and just fell in love straight away. Went out the next day and picked up the album and it's very, very, very, very good if you like that whole gentle sixties' pop thing. Felt it would make a difference from two weeks of EMO on the trot. Alas, didn't do much for me in the Koganleague...

Also, they're insanely hott as bands go.

Yeah, it's a great little record, isn't it? I'd have preferred to have "Give Me Love" over one of the weaker album tracks (though I can't think which I'd take off) and her voice DOES get a bit screechy occasionally but the songs are generally very good.

"Lips Are Unhappy" was just... BANG... perfect when I first heard it. A few people really were hoping "Add Your Light" would be 2007's "Pull Shapes". Alas.

I've never understood why you and Abby and Jessica loved them at all in the first place. The thing isn't even that catchy.

Not catchy? Oh dear god, Lex, what are you smoking? The pitch-shifted backing vocals drilled into my head on the first listen, and that completely unthinking riff in the chorus is BEST FUN EVER to air guitar too while banging your head.

Yes, I do this. And have done it repeatedly. I'm still not sure if it really was my favourite single of 2005 but it had my highest play count of anything so that was that.

As I said, my guess is that the song will actually get a lot of play from me and if we'd rated in, say, two weeks it would probably empirically be a big win. But that vocal tick *really* bugs me - which is saying something considering all the bad singers I listen to. And imagine my surprise when my visions of the smarmy singer proved totally true upon watching the video!

Losers:
--TRACK EIGHT (Yes): I think Yes's vocals are tremendously underrated. There's this shivery quality to their harmonies in particular. Still, all the prog complication gets in the way of the emotional force.
--TRACK SIX (Lucky Soul): Really nice horns, neo-Motown singing, love the drumshots; wish this knew how to inhabit its sounds better.
--TRACK THREE (Maxi, Dick & Twink): Catchy and fun-style faux, um, whatever it is... German music hall? This will take several listens before I truly ascertain its emotional content (or lack thereof). Its sarcastic brightness gets wearing over the length of the song.
--TRACK FOUR (High Contrast): Is this what you in your country call spizz garage? Is appealing, the way the vocals work as paint strokes. I like the inventiveness, but my emotions won't endorse. Fascinating track, though.

It (High Contrast) is liquid drum and bass, which means it's sort of... smiley? It's slightly euphoric and very smooth. The track in question was one of my favourite post-work-kill-all-humans-got-to-get-on-another-bus songs, it's actually off a Hospital Records mix but I don't think it was mucked around with much.

Fact fans will be interested to know it is only track from Wales I have submitted, which is quite disappointing really since there is a lot of good Welsh music.

By 'fact fans' I mean 'people with very little else to do other than ponder whether the Hot Puppies are crap or kind of endearing,' obv.

Maxi Dick & Twink = proof that the Irish have indeed never been good at pop.

I love this track, but I suspected i was probably the only person in the world who does. I figured being out of contention I had nothing to lose. Turns out I was right.

For anyone who is at all interested, this track came 2nd in the Irish preselection for Eurovision in 1970, beaten by the eventual winner, Dana (All Kinds of Everything).

I already know the Pointer Sisters song! I got it off Idolator a while ago as, I suspect, did

epicharmus

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Chart Championship Week 12 RESULTS now with REVEALS

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YES IT'S YES

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Track 7

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RESULT!!!

It's Swedish!!

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You won't work, you won't try to find yo' self a job

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The short answer to what's wrong with British pop:

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HA

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A justification

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