poptimists | Scott Manson is an idiot

As found in last Friday's London Lite, under the heading of 'Scott Manson's Clubland', possibly the daftest piece of dance music journalism ever:

Plug in for a charge of Electro therapy

The rumours were false: clubland is not dead. It was just resting. To be fair, the sort of bacchanalian nightclub that would probably see P.Diddy pronounce it "a bit much" did dwindle, replaced by identikit dancetarias playing pop trance and filled with hard-faced blokes and women who looked like they had put on blusher with the vigour of someone brushing a horse.

Elsewhere, it was all "The Strokes this" and "NME that" and "oh, you still listen to dance music do you?" Guitar based rock was the hot ticket and gig-going became the new clubbing.

Now, I LIKE incredibly loud, raucous sounds. Don't get me wrong. I watched Big Brother and I once dated a woman with two children. But this was a sad time as dance music, the most vibrant youth culture since punk (and which lasted 10 times as long) appeared to be withering on the vine.

Or was it? Slowly, from about March this year, coming out of the annual dance industry jamboree that is the Miami Winter Music Conference, a sound emerged that caught the ear of tastemaker DJs, producers and, crucially, punters. It had funk, it had bass and it had immediate appeal across different dance music tribes. It's called electro and it's the sound of summer.

The appeal of this dirty, bassy sound ranges from cool London pirate stations such as Passion FM through to the Hed Kandi-style funky house disco-pubs where tanned young chaps and girls in short skirts slug Bacardi Breezers by the bucketful. Not since rave has a sound been so universally popular, with traditional House DJs such as Eric Morillo playing the same records as the darkest "grime" DJs. Listen to the Tocadisco mix of The Egg's Walking Away or Mandy's Body language or anything on the German Kompakt label and you will see why dance music has pulled itself out of the doldrums. Electro is the sound of now and it's brilliant.

[Stuff about where to hear this exciting new sound omitted]

The dance floor has been invigorated. Go seek out some electro-shock therapy.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Obviously I could hardly be less well informed about this kind of thing, being an old bloke who hasn't been clubbing since the late '90s, but this reads like the words of someone who knows about it only from reading other newspaper columns on what is trendy now.

It's not as bad as "THE EMO MENACE" when it comes to bad music writing in 06.

That has made my afternoon, really it has.

The misinformation doesn't bother me at all - whatevs - but what is really awful about this article is that anyone reading about music is going to turn the page in disgust if there isn't a p1ss-weak gag every two sentences.

Sorry, "is the apparent assumption that anyone reading about music..."

"Now, I LIKE incredibly loud, raucous sounds. Don't get me wrong. I watched Big Brother and I once dated a woman with two children."

Speechless.

Maybe there should be some law saying that if you fail as a stand-up you aren't allowed to use words in any capacity ever for 10 years?

You have to admit "Bacardi Breezers by the bucketful" has a certain ring to it.

After a bit of googling, I've discovered this Manson chap is an ex-editor of both Loaded and Ministry. It just gets worse...

Basically this article could be summed up as "I went to the Miami Winter Music Conference, got utterly wasted and can't remember anything, and my editor just asked me to write 400 words about future of dance music. By August I still hadn't come up with anything so I shat onto a bit of paper and submitted that instead."

Or , possibly, "the London Lite may have only just started but already I despise my job & readership enough to toss off some musical-illiterate nonsense because it's not like any of them will care or deserve to know."

Has the term "electro" not previously been used for a musical style?

why let historical, cultural and terminological accuracy spoil things?

Surely emo-electro is to be the hot new thing.

Scott Manson is an idiot

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DEATH TO FALSE JOCULARITY

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Truth behind the article

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The Emo-Electro Menace